FWIW, things that I sometimes find it helpful to remember, when I manage to remember them:
It is often better and more productive to step back, breathe, and take time to think through things than to try to participate while your head is exploding, which just gets messy. Exploding allies help no-one.
If I don't post or contribute right now this very second, I'm not going to wake up tomorrow and find that all discussion of race in fandom and sf/f is suddenly over and I missed my chance. It's not going to be over for a long damn while, and thus it makes sense to pace yourself for the long haul.
The debate will probably not collapse for lack of my Very Important Thoughts About What I As A White Woman Think About This (I find this comforting, as well as surprisingly hard to remember).
Listening never hurts. Yes, there's the danger of only listening and using it as an excuse to avoid putting yourself on the line, but I don't think you're in danger of that right now (you argued with Shetterly; I'm pretty sure you get hazard pay for that ...).
You can always link and point at other people saying smart things (one of the many reasons I linkspam so compulsively).
ciderpress blows my mind, always
It is often better and more productive to step back, breathe, and take time to think through things than to try to participate while your head is exploding, which just gets messy. Exploding allies help no-one.
If I don't post or contribute right now this very second, I'm not going to wake up tomorrow and find that all discussion of race in fandom and sf/f is suddenly over and I missed my chance. It's not going to be over for a long damn while, and thus it makes sense to pace yourself for the long haul.
The debate will probably not collapse for lack of my Very Important Thoughts About What I As A White Woman Think About This (I find this comforting, as well as surprisingly hard to remember).
Listening never hurts. Yes, there's the danger of only listening and using it as an excuse to avoid putting yourself on the line, but I don't think you're in danger of that right now (you argued with Shetterly; I'm pretty sure you get hazard pay for that ...).
You can always link and point at other people saying smart things (one of the many reasons I linkspam so compulsively).
Oh, and boggling at the SPARKLY UNICORN ORGASM TWILIGHT WANK will help cleanse and refresh your brain.
(I already successfully inflicted it on