sholio | Privilege meme

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meme

Privilege meme

As seen on several people's blogs ... I thought this might be interesting to do, even though the more I looked at the list, the more laughable I found it. (But more on that at the end.)

The bolded items are those that are true of me.

Father went to college
Father finished college
Mother went to college
Mother finished college
Have any relative who is an attorney, physician, or professor
Were the same or higher class than your high school teachers
Had more than 50 books in your childhood home
Had more than 500 books in your childhood home
Were read children's books by a parent
Had lessons of any kind before you turned 18 (I guess this one's a "maybe", depending on whether being home-schooled counts as having had lessons. I did not attend regular school.)
Had more than two kinds of lessons before you turned 18
The people in the media who dress and talk like me are portrayed positively
Had a credit card with your name on it before you turned 18
Your parents (or a trust) paid for the majority of your college costs
Your parents (or a trust) paid for all of your college costs
Went to a private high school
Went to summer camp
Had a private tutor before you turned 18
Family vacations involved staying at hotels
Your clothing was all bought new before you turned 18
Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them
There was original art in your house when you were a child (I'm actually not quite sure whether to bold this one, because I drew all the time, but I don't really think that's the sort of original art that they mean. Still, this one's a "maybe", because I *did* have lots of access to art supplies.)
Had a phone in your room before you turned 18
You and your family lived in a single family house
Your parent(s) owned their own house or apartment before you left home (cabin with no running water -- but we owned it!)
You had your own room as a child
Participated in an SAT/ACT prep course
Had your own TV in your room in High School
Owned a mutual fund or IRA in High School or College
Flew anywhere on a commercial airline before you turned 16
Went on a cruise with your family
Went on more than one cruise with your family
Your parents took you to museums and art galleries as you grew up
You were unaware of how much heating bills were for your family

The list is based on an exercise developed by Will Barratt, Meagan Cahill, Angie Carlen, Minnette Huck, Drew Lurker, Stacy Ploskonka at Illinois State University. The exercise developers ask that if you participate in this blog game, you acknowledge their copyright. *done!*

To participate, copy and paste the list into your blog, and bold the items that are true for you.

It's kind of interesting to me what constitutes "privilege" on this particular list. Some of these make sense to me; others seem like ridiculous extravagances, like having a TV or a car as a teenager. "Your parents bought you a car that was not a hand-me-down from them" ... that one made me laugh, because by implication, getting a hand-me-down car isn't privileged? WTF? What if your parents didn't own a car at all, as mine didn't? What about access to things like food and medical care? I remember times when we had to borrow food from neighbors or get boxes from the food bank or, god, the summer we had to live off the land ...! It makes me raise my eyebrows if the compilers of the list don't ask any questions about access to basic human needs, but they consider "privilege" to hinge on whether one can afford a dedicated phone line for their child? And they have not just one but TWO questions about going on cruises? Who wrote this thing?

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I agree. And ditto about the food bank one. been there, done that.

We could do a better list. :) Some of the questions are just odd.

I don't think they meant 'privileged compared to a homeless guy on the street', but yeah, there are a few iffy questions.

The summer you had to live off the land? Wow. If you don't mind me asking - was it a result of money, or choice, or geographic seclusion...?

Sort of a combination of all three. We lived in a very rural area out of choice, and kinda lived off the land a little bit anyway, but there were times when we were forced to subsist on what we could harvest or shoot, and those were some lean times. I don't envy hunter-gatherers one teeny bit. (Well, all right ... in some ways, I do. But I also know how incredibly hard it is.)

I'm actually really happy that I grew up that way. It was interesting and different and gave me tons of fodder for fiction! And I know every plant that grows around here that you can eat, which is kind of a cool, specialized subset of knowledge to have. But it was certainly a precarious existence at times.

Whenever you write about your childhood, it really does sound amazing. And I'm even jealous of it, in a distant, never-actually-had-to-live-through it way - it sounds like living in the kind of books I read as a kid, full of nature and adventure.

And I also remember the post you made about how precarious parents were with their kids these days, not allowing them anything approaching the sort of freedom you had, so - again, if you don't mind my asking: would you raise your children in the same conditions you were raised? If you were in the same place your parents were? Or would you try to strive for something else? As a child, you were taken care of; I imagine the situation was different from your parents' POV...

It was actually an awesome way to grow up -- for me, as a kid, at the time. My mother's told me some things about how terrifying it was for her, though, as a (mostly) single mom who didn't even have a phone, trying to raise three kids and being unable to call for help (or afford medical care) if one of them got sick.

I honestly don't know how close to that I want my kids' lives to be. On the one hand, I'm glad I know what it feels like to go hungry, and that I had to make my own way after I turned 18. On the other hand, if my (hypothetical) 18-year-old children called me up and asked for money, I'd probably cave like a house of cards. My husband and I are a lot higher on the economic spectrum than either of our families were. I don't think I'd deliberately give a child a life of hardship just to make them a better person -- but I hope that I'll have the emotional fortitude not to buy them anything they ask for, too.

Wow, I was looking at the list and having the opposite reaction. "Father finished college" - how about "Father has PhD"? And in some ways camping is a more priviledged activity than staying in a motel; and NOT having a TV when your family could afford one is a priviledge, I think. And what about, "Owned own musical instruments" or "Had encyclopedia set in house" or "Had more than one encyclopedia set in the house" or "Was a private tutor befor you were 18".

Huh, maybe I'll do this meme later after all.

- Helen

I did the meme, posted and then deleted it, I got so pissed at their assumptions. Personally, I think their definition of "privileged" needs adjusting--or else they're just running off what their own lives were like. Seems obvious to me that the authors all grew up "privileged" according to their own definition.

I really don't think the writers did a bad job; I've filled out a number of undergraduate, graduate, and professionally-constructed surveys that were far worse. At least, for most of their questions, I can answer yes or no.

I think the biggest privilege I went out into the world with is that I knew, growing up, why the answer to any of those questions was yes or no - I think having parents who discuss their life choices with me, and respect mine, is huge.

- Helen

Oops, I meant for this to be a general reply to

friendshipper's post, not your comment specifically. My apologies.

Heh, yeah, and I didn't realize when I first saw this thing circulating that it's aimed at incoming ISU freshmen, which does make a big difference -- I guess if you've never even encountered the idea of economic/social bias, it might be an eye-opener (at least at the remedial level ... don't want to scare the poor dears with too much reality yet *g*). I certainly think that the authors' own biases are hanging out all over the place, though!

It makes sense that this is extremely skewed since it's designed to be used as an exercise for incoming college students at ISU. If it wanted to really start with the more basic level of privilege it wouldn't have really created much distinction among the students. Odds are most of the students at ISU are already privileged compared to most of society.

As for the car thing...well...let's just say that my high school was a tad ridiculous and I was unusual in that my parent's *didn't* give me a car at 16. I remember once sitting with two classmates folding something for Rotary Interact. One of them was and old friend and the other the richest girl in the school. Said old friend and I were...still very privileged but probably on the lower end of the school and we sat there and listened to rich girl complain how she has to drive the Jaguar to school because it's her family's junk car and her mom bought her so many designer label clothes she doesn't have enough closet space and they're only going to be able to spend a month in Austria this summer...

So...okay, I'm not sure where I'm going with this. But that's why this thing *is* skewed - it's designed to work with kids who already have a pretty high baseline of privilege.

It actually makes a *lot* more sense that way, because I've just seen it around as a free-floating meme ... and can definitely see how it would be an eye-opener for someone whose baseline was so high that they'd never even considered some of the things they took for granted were benefits and not things that everybody has.

*nods*
The first time I saw it there was a link back to where it was taken from. The poster was complaining about the meme for a lot of the reasons you were but when I clicked over to see what the list was created for, it made sense.

I mean, I went to high school in Illinois and I've seen the kinds of students who go to ISU, and while I'm sure some of them got there by their bootstraps and knew what it was like to not be privileged, I guarantee most of them had a very high level.

By these criteria, my sister & I had a *very* privilieged upbringing - but my folks never shied away from letting us know that it *was* a privilege. My dad's parents kept the family going on what she grew and what he shot, and there weren't any vacations, just summer jobs, when my dad was little. My mother's father and his siblings frequently went hungry as children, and it was sheer determination on his part that afforded my mother her education and trips to Europe and all the rest.

And yeah, what's with the cruises and the mutual funds? What high school kid has an IRA, for goodness' sake?

What high school kid has an IRA, for goodness' sake?

I got one the summer after I graduated high school....but, see, my dad worked in the pension business for 18 years and was/is a huge proponent of IRA's and it was declared that I Would Start One The First Time I Officially Earned Taxable $2000. I guess technically I was no longer a high school kid.

(but the thing with the IRA thing is it means the high school kid had to have had an official job to have earned the taxable income to put into the IRA and...it would seem to me like the more privileged kids wouldn't have jobs in high school (I didn't besides babysitting until after high school - and I was like you - privileged but from family who still remembered the lack of privilege)).

It's just my opinion, but I don't think there would be any use asking questions about basic human rights on a "privilege" list. Sure, some of those things on the list are silly, but from what I understand this was developed by University students. There is a big problem, currently - I don't know how it used to be - with kids in University feeling they're entitled to things just because they've been brought up that way. A car from mommy and daddy is not always seen as a privilege nowadays.

I never needed anything, and most of what I wanted I got when I was young. Still do, actually. I've never needed anything, but I was lucky because I had parents who took care to remind me that I got because I deserved, and not because I was due. Not everyone did.

This meme can be a positive thing for the Kings and Queens of the World I have the pleasure of encountering in class. Not everyone would find this list laughable, or extravagant - and that's a big part of the I Am Entitled problem. If they knew they were privileged - whatever the parameters established - maybe they'd act accordingly...and shut the hell up in class! :)

Yeah, I'm thinking the only benefit to something like this would be to someone who'd lived a very sheltered life. If all their peers have a certain kind of lifestyle, then they think the whole world is like that. It's a little alarming to contemplate that people who think that way are, quite often, people who end up running society.

Very true. And I say that as someone who was insanely privileged growing up. But then I have always known that. Most of the ones that didn't apply to me didn't not because we couldn't afford it, but because of the choices my parents made.

I was amused by the "Father finished college" Because my father didn't, but it wasn't because his family couldn't afford it. It was because of the time. It was during WWII and lots of young men left college - and then returned and went on the post grad school. My sister and I often teased him about that...how he was a college drop-out. Never mind that he went of law school once he got home.

Well according to this, I was one "privileged" kid. ;) But then again, I was acutely aware of that fact the moment my father came home driving a mid-life crisis car (and by the end of the month the whole school, who somehow never knew me before, would randomly stop me in the halls and ask about it).

Some things though, I don't really see a "privilege", and more like an extension of profession/personality. My dad is a self-taught computer expert, so we always had computers around the house, as it was his profession. When he wasn't working for a company, he was having to buy them for his at-home businesses, so naturally the kids got the recycled older models. We were very much (and still are) a "techie" family. The last laptop/computer count for the household was very, very sad.

The SAT/ACT prep course question though gives me a little "WTF?" Those were offered through our high school, I believe at little to no extra cost to students. And the last one, it's much more about the cooling bills here in Texas than the heating ones...

Very strange! It seems to be sorting middle and upper-class kids apart, but with little reference to lower class.

Some other obvious questions aren't asked, though, that would go along even with the type of sorting I think is happening here:
Received need-based aid for college
Received academic scholarship for college
Received sports scholarship for college
Had a job while in high school (maybe too difficult--you'd need more questions to get at who had a job for gas money for the car from their parents, who had one to get college money, and who had one just to support the family)
Had a part-time job while in college
Had a full-time job while in college

I teach at a public research university. We get many students who work full-time but go to college full-time too, or work full-time and go to college part-time.

I've also known parents who worked really frigging hard to put kids through college; that's a kind of privilege, but a very different one than going on cruises!

I think it's more along the lines of a "how privileged were you?" rather than a general "were you privileged?"

Or just a way of getting kids who have *never* thought about it to think about it.

Who ever wrote it was a dick. I considered doing it but my parents didn't even finish school! They finished paying off the house 8 months before my Dad passed away 5 years ago, I'm one of 10 so how the hell would I get new clothes (I got my brothers clothes). Family vacations didn't happen. We went to the beach once, the seagulls chased us and half us kids got sick :) (BTW, we were lucky that seatbelts didn't come in until 1978 when my oldest sister got her licence, we did trips all in one car!) Of COURSE I went to a private school, I'M CATHOLIC! ;) with that many kids what do you expect.
Sorry I didn't mean to vent here but after reading your response I thought you might understand.

Oh, I don't mind. I'm inclined to agree. *g*

btw ,would you like to friend me *please!!!!*

*shrugs* Sure; friending people is kind of a haphazard thing with me, so it certainly doesn't mean anything personal if I *don't* friend someone (just general apathy), but I don't mind doing so either. :)

I know, I friend someone and then I don't have anything to say :) just look at my lj. *shakes head* I wasn't taking it personally, it's just that you and some others sometimes trigger me into saying something profound on my journal :D

Two things bug me about this. First, what this list suggests "privileged upbringing" means. Obviously, the theory is that, if you had money, you were privileged. But, much in the same way that greyias questioned the connection of some of these questions to money, why is it assumed that having parents who liked books or took you to museums means you had a lot of money? On the other side of the coin, why is it assumed that, if you had money, that you had an easy life? That's a dangerous and absurd assumption. I know plenty of people who grew up with more money than me, whose childhood's were a lot worse. I've always believed you were privileged if your parents loved you and encouraged you. That's worth far more than going on a cruise.

The second thing that puzzles me about this is, what's the intent? Some folks asked this in the comments above, but I wonder, if it intended to somehow demonstrate to kids that they're privileged, so what? If they are, is this a bad thing? Should they feel guilty? Even if the intent is only to humble, then what? All of a sudden, they're going to give away all their worldly goods and become hare krishna? They're going to re-evaluate their lives, realize how "shallow" they are, and suddenly feel sympathy and compassion where before they didn't? I'm sorry, but that's nonsense.

I admit, reading this list annoyed me in part because my sweet, 19 year old cousin was just on the receiving end of an abusive rant from her boyfriend, and, when, in tears, she tried to get him to calm down, he snapped that "she couldn't possibly understand" what was wrong, because she had grown up with parents who loved her. He said it like she should feel bad because of it, as if she couldn't ever be as "deep" or as "real" as he is. I do not understand that sort of thinking. And the defensive reactions that some folks above seem to be having (including me) to this list is whether, like my cousin, it's intent is to make us feel bad because we grew up with the things on this list. That we're lesser because of it.

Of course I was privileged to have parents who loved books, who weren't American so we flew over to England most years to see our family (on "commercial airlines!" shock! As opposed to what? Non-commercial airlines?), and who dragged me around to museums and art galleries and cathedrals and Louisa May Alcott's house. Is this supposed to mean that, somehow, I should be humbled and ashamed to have parents like that? What is it supposed to teach me? That I shouldn't do the same for my kids? Get real. My kids are going to be dragged to the same things I was and, here's the kicker, a lot of museums and galleries are free, books can be borrowed from the library, and if taking an SAT prep course helps my kid do better on SATs? I'm going to make sure that happens, money or no money. And I'm not going to be humble about it.

(Sorry for the long post. Apparently, this meme rubbed me the wrong way.)

Tippergreen - hope you don't mind that I friended you! I found your comments interesting and expect that your journal entries will be, too! Haven't even checked that out - I've got a lot of faith!

As far as the questionnaire goes, I find it ... incomplete and unfocused. I think that whoever prepared it confused or mixed-together "professional, educated background" with "business-oriented, wealthy background." Also, immigrants and third-generation U.S. residents often have different financial situations but may well have similar aspirations for their kids. Thus, poorer families might give their kids books, tutoring, SAT-prep courses, music lessons, visits to museums, concerts, etc. However, the same poorer families might NOT give their kids designer label new clothes, a car, a cruise vacation, a TV in their room, etc. Always within the limits of family income, "privilege" seems to me to be a matter of values, education, and priorities. Therefore, the questions to ask are difficult to design so as to elicit a true picture of "privilege" from either a financially-privileged or an educationally-privileged point of view.

Interesting, though. Made me think, always a good thing! Thanks for sharing.
Love, max

Oh dear! I have to warn you, I'm not that interesting! LOL! I think I was just venting on poor Sholio's LJ. But I'm happy you friended me! I hope it isn't too boring!

And I agree with you, that it was unfocused. I also think you've nailed my first issue on the head, with the confusion of extravagence with education. I really wonder what they're end results will be like, and what they hope to accomplish.

See you around!

>on "commercial airlines!" shock! As opposed to what? Non-commercial airlines?),

*snickers* I'm not sure I know what the difference is. Didn't know there were two kinds of airlines until this quiz. I don't know which ones I travel on now...

I haven't been ignoring this comment, just busy. *g* Like I've said in the past, I really hate the word privilege, not the basic concept so much as the way it reduces a complex situation to a soundbite. The basic idea is a sound one -- to make people think about things they take for granted and realize that not everyone has those things. But a quiz like this one, I think, is really everything that's wrong with taking a complicated, not "one size fits all" situation and reducing it to a silly litmus test. And you've done a fantastic job of distilling it down to one simple question, "What's the intent?" (God I love having smart people on my friend list. *g*)

Huh. Weird. And also totally US-centric. I mean, I don't even know what some of those things mean (IRA?), and I'm pretty well-versed in Americanisms. But, yeah - having a phone is privileged, but having a used car isn't? What?

But it is interesting to see people thinking about the question of privilege, how it's played into their lives and what is and isn't a privilege.

Word on your entire paragraph at the bottom.

I don't want a TV in my room. I don't want a phone in my room. It seems so silly that it's a priviledge when I think of it as 'excessive waste' -- the money that could have gone to that went instead to, say, a bike or roller blades or something.

(That said, I sorta had a TV in my room because I slept in the living room until about 14 years of age. Different country, different standards. *g*)

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Privilege meme

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silly, isn't it?