Here, for the record, are all of my feelings about the Regent of Centauri Prime, the actual factual first character for whom I wrote fic—an isolated incident until 2011—and about whom I couldn't say much either for spoiler-related reasons.
Thank you; I will go read it! (I must have skipped over that as not relevant to my interests at the time; little did I realize.)
Thanks to the original broadcast schedule, there were four months between "Movements of Fire and Shadow" and "The Fall of Centauri Prime," which turned a terrible cliffhanger into a full-body wrecking ball.
Oh NO. Honestly I can't even imagine the gut punch that watching this completely unspoiled would have been. At least knowing a little of Londo's ending (aside from having osmosed incorrectly was that he was being puppeted by Shadows, I at least got the gist of it) I was able to prepare myself emotionally beforehand. At least to a degree, anyway - it turns out that knowing about it definitely did not prepare me for the actual effect of seeing all of it unfold on my screen, but at least I didn't go into it completely cold, let alone after a four-month wait!
The second half I find almost too painful to watch. G'Kar's formal salute of Londo—because there's so much behind it—is about the only thing that doesn't hurt worse. If they hadn't had their last unobserved conversation, I'd have eaten my TV screen.
I know, all of that hurt so much I could hardly bear it. But I agree that the final salute from G'Kar and Londo's bow in return is lovely. (And also yet another echo, as it reflects G'Kar's goodbye with Delenn a couple of episodes ago, his salute to her returned by her heart-touch, each person expressing their respect and affection in the gestures of their culture.) As we've talked about on recent posts, G'Kar's incredibly hard-won affinity for Londo is extremely hard to shake off once it's settled in - Londo being an asshole in the council chambers didn't even dent it, and Londo apparently taking up the reins of Centauri power with full intention to wield it with a heavy hand isn't a death knell for their friendship. (And apparently never is, since it's clear that the love and loyalty is still there, fifteen years from now, whatever happens in between.)
And I spent the middle part of the episode, once it becomes clear where it's going, in an absolute agony of "oh, please let him and G'Kar have one more scene before he gets that thing in his head" - I had some idea from gifs/vaguely osmosed spoilers that they had some kind of goodbye, I desperately wanted it to be with Londo still free, and it was ... his absolute last act as a free man, in fact. "I do not know why it matters to me now" - words with more meaning than G'Kar has the context to understand, he's rapidly running out of time and this may be the last thing he ever gets to do solely as himself. But it does matter, he needs to have some kind of last connection with G'Kar before he ceases, potentially, to be himself. The terror and pain that's visible in him throughout that scene, which G'Kar can't understand, but clearly he recognizes at least some of it anyway. And the depth of emotion in that final conversation, G'Kar's forgiveness, the Centauri arm clasp, the way they hold each other's gaze for a last long moment and you can see Londo visibly having to tear himself away.
(He died on his feet, doing something noble and brave, but not futile.)
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Thank you; I will go read it! (I must have skipped over that as not relevant to my interests at the time; little did I realize.)
Thanks to the original broadcast schedule, there were four months between "Movements of Fire and Shadow" and "The Fall of Centauri Prime," which turned a terrible cliffhanger into a full-body wrecking ball.
Oh NO. Honestly I can't even imagine the gut punch that watching this completely unspoiled would have been. At least knowing a little of Londo's ending (aside from having osmosed incorrectly was that he was being puppeted by Shadows, I at least got the gist of it) I was able to prepare myself emotionally beforehand. At least to a degree, anyway - it turns out that knowing about it definitely did not prepare me for the actual effect of seeing all of it unfold on my screen, but at least I didn't go into it completely cold, let alone after a four-month wait!
The second half I find almost too painful to watch. G'Kar's formal salute of Londo—because there's so much behind it—is about the only thing that doesn't hurt worse. If they hadn't had their last unobserved conversation, I'd have eaten my TV screen.
I know, all of that hurt so much I could hardly bear it. But I agree that the final salute from G'Kar and Londo's bow in return is lovely. (And also yet another echo, as it reflects G'Kar's goodbye with Delenn a couple of episodes ago, his salute to her returned by her heart-touch, each person expressing their respect and affection in the gestures of their culture.) As we've talked about on recent posts, G'Kar's incredibly hard-won affinity for Londo is extremely hard to shake off once it's settled in - Londo being an asshole in the council chambers didn't even dent it, and Londo apparently taking up the reins of Centauri power with full intention to wield it with a heavy hand isn't a death knell for their friendship. (And apparently never is, since it's clear that the love and loyalty is still there, fifteen years from now, whatever happens in between.)
And I spent the middle part of the episode, once it becomes clear where it's going, in an absolute agony of "oh, please let him and G'Kar have one more scene before he gets that thing in his head" - I had some idea from gifs/vaguely osmosed spoilers that they had some kind of goodbye, I desperately wanted it to be with Londo still free, and it was ... his absolute last act as a free man, in fact. "I do not know why it matters to me now" - words with more meaning than G'Kar has the context to understand, he's rapidly running out of time and this may be the last thing he ever gets to do solely as himself. But it does matter, he needs to have some kind of last connection with G'Kar before he ceases, potentially, to be himself. The terror and pain that's visible in him throughout that scene, which G'Kar can't understand, but clearly he recognizes at least some of it anyway. And the depth of emotion in that final conversation, G'Kar's forgiveness, the Centauri arm clasp, the way they hold each other's gaze for a last long moment and you can see Londo visibly having to tear himself away.
(He died on his feet, doing something noble and brave, but not futile.)