Yes, I loved that one too for ENTIRELY predictable reasons! It's just such a good growth episode for Charles (and the sort of almost-friendship they're reluctantly developing almost in spite of themselves). Charles being both his worst and best self in that episode and Hawkeye getting to see all of it is great. I especially love the "You know why / Yes I do" exchange in the OR (and the way Hawkeye looks around at him quickly when he admits it) and the way he clearly expects Hawkeye to berate him for it afterwards, but Hawkeye won't play along, not just because Hawkeye is not like that, but also because he can see that Charles is being harder on himself than anyone else could be. And then the lovely grace note of the ending. ♥
It's actually really interesting to compare this to the fight they have just a season or so earlier after he gave the patient the wrong drug - I think that was the episode where the whole camp was passing around the mystery novel? - because in that case Hawkeye *did* yell at him, and deservedly so, but I don't know if he's fully parsed that the real problem in that case was that he was doubling down on how it wasn't his fault and he essentially wanted Hawkeye to absolve him of blame, which Hawkeye of course refused to do. And here it's a very similar situation - Hawkeye having to fix a mistake he made that could have killed the patient - but the whole dynamic is completely different; he realizes he messed up, he folds as soon as he realizes that, and he's absolutely wallowing in guilt at the end.
And Hawkeye recognizes all of that - I don't know if he's mentally comparing it to the earlier situation or not, but Charles clearly hasn't figured out that Hawkeye has no desire to punish anyone, or to lord "being right" over anyone; he just wants them to do better, and Charles clearly is on the right track to doing better here, so Hawkeye is generous and gracious enough to pet him a little at the end. And he really cares a lot what Hawkeye thinks of him! He'd probably deny it to his dying day, but he does, and that was on display even back in the other episode where he almost killed a patient - the way he chases Hawkeye down to try to get Hawkeye to tell him it's not his fault! - but in this case he does get what he was trying to get there, and he does it not by actively looking for it, but by being genuinely sorry and trying to do the right thing. I just love their dynamic so much.
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Yes, I loved that one too for ENTIRELY predictable reasons! It's just such a good growth episode for Charles (and the sort of almost-friendship they're reluctantly developing almost in spite of themselves). Charles being both his worst and best self in that episode and Hawkeye getting to see all of it is great. I especially love the "You know why / Yes I do" exchange in the OR (and the way Hawkeye looks around at him quickly when he admits it) and the way he clearly expects Hawkeye to berate him for it afterwards, but Hawkeye won't play along, not just because Hawkeye is not like that, but also because he can see that Charles is being harder on himself than anyone else could be. And then the lovely grace note of the ending. ♥
It's actually really interesting to compare this to the fight they have just a season or so earlier after he gave the patient the wrong drug - I think that was the episode where the whole camp was passing around the mystery novel? - because in that case Hawkeye *did* yell at him, and deservedly so, but I don't know if he's fully parsed that the real problem in that case was that he was doubling down on how it wasn't his fault and he essentially wanted Hawkeye to absolve him of blame, which Hawkeye of course refused to do. And here it's a very similar situation - Hawkeye having to fix a mistake he made that could have killed the patient - but the whole dynamic is completely different; he realizes he messed up, he folds as soon as he realizes that, and he's absolutely wallowing in guilt at the end.
And Hawkeye recognizes all of that - I don't know if he's mentally comparing it to the earlier situation or not, but Charles clearly hasn't figured out that Hawkeye has no desire to punish anyone, or to lord "being right" over anyone; he just wants them to do better, and Charles clearly is on the right track to doing better here, so Hawkeye is generous and gracious enough to pet him a little at the end. And he really cares a lot what Hawkeye thinks of him! He'd probably deny it to his dying day, but he does, and that was on display even back in the other episode where he almost killed a patient - the way he chases Hawkeye down to try to get Hawkeye to tell him it's not his fault! - but in this case he does get what he was trying to get there, and he does it not by actively looking for it, but by being genuinely sorry and trying to do the right thing. I just love their dynamic so much.